1 00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:05,922 ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:05,482 D' 3 00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:07,734 Aah! 4 00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:25,585 Well, children, it's the last day of school. 5 00:01:25,668 --> 00:01:27,796 Yay! 6 00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:29,089 Here are your grades. 7 00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:33,176 No, Mrs. Krabappel, 8 00:01:33,259 --> 00:01:34,552 if I don't get a "C" average, 9 00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,387 my dad won't let me go to Kamp Krusty. 10 00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:38,598 Well, it isn't fair to the other children, 11 00:01:38,681 --> 00:01:39,681 but all right. 12 00:01:42,811 --> 00:01:44,813 Much obliged, doll. 13 00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:49,192 Bart Simpson, I'm gonna miss you. 14 00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:50,318 Attention, everyone. 15 00:01:50,401 --> 00:01:52,153 This is Principal Skinner. 16 00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:53,863 I trust you all remembered to bring in 17 00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:55,490 your implements of destruction? 18 00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:03,414 Now let's trash this dump. 19 00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:08,002 ♪ School's out for summer ♪ 20 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:15,176 ♪ School's out forever ♪ 21 00:02:19,097 --> 00:02:21,391 Somebody put a torch to these permanent records. 22 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:22,474 Quickly now. 23 00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:28,481 ♪ Fa-la-la-la-la ♪ 24 00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:30,233 ♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪ 25 00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:31,651 ♪ La-la-la-la-la... ♪ 26 00:02:31,734 --> 00:02:32,819 Wake up, boy. 27 00:02:34,445 --> 00:02:37,532 I dreamt it was the last day of school. 28 00:02:37,615 --> 00:02:39,784 Well, it is. 29 00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,953 How do I know 30 00:02:42,036 --> 00:02:44,247 this isn't some beautiful dream, too? 31 00:02:45,582 --> 00:02:47,709 You know, a pinch is more traditional. 32 00:02:53,214 --> 00:02:56,009 Homer, you do remember your promise to the children. 33 00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:57,260 Sure do. 34 00:02:57,343 --> 00:02:59,679 When you're 18, you're out the door. 35 00:02:59,762 --> 00:03:01,264 No, Dad, you promised if Bart and I 36 00:03:01,347 --> 00:03:02,599 got "C" averages, 37 00:03:02,682 --> 00:03:04,267 we could go to Kamp Krusty. 38 00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:06,019 And with no false modesty, 39 00:03:06,102 --> 00:03:08,271 you're looking at one happy camper. 40 00:03:08,354 --> 00:03:09,856 Heh, yeah, well... 41 00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:11,608 just remember, when you see my report card 42 00:03:11,691 --> 00:03:13,460 they got this whole new grading system this year. 43 00:03:13,484 --> 00:03:15,403 It now goes, "D," "B," "A," "C." 44 00:03:15,486 --> 00:03:17,864 Now, listen, boy, we have an understanding 45 00:03:17,947 --> 00:03:19,307 and you better keep your end of it. 46 00:03:19,365 --> 00:03:21,159 I don't think I'd be any kind of a father 47 00:03:21,242 --> 00:03:23,786 if you got "D's," and I let you go to Kamp Krusty. 48 00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:25,496 - But, Dad... - Son, 49 00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:27,457 if you really want something in this life, 50 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,459 you have to work for it. Now quiet... 51 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:30,936 They're about to announce the lottery numbers. 52 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:31,836 17... 53 00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:32,754 D' 54 00:03:32,837 --> 00:03:34,172 - 32... - D' 55 00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:35,423 - Five... - D' 56 00:03:35,506 --> 00:03:36,841 - Eight... - Woo-hoo! 57 00:03:36,925 --> 00:03:38,676 - 47... - D' 58 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:40,011 Attention, students, 59 00:03:40,094 --> 00:03:41,596 Please clear out your lockers 60 00:03:41,679 --> 00:03:43,681 into the wastebaskets provided. 61 00:03:43,765 --> 00:03:46,851 36-24-36. 62 00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:52,190 Now, let's see what we got here. 63 00:03:54,317 --> 00:03:55,735 My gym shorts. 64 00:04:01,157 --> 00:04:02,784 Here are your final report cards. 65 00:04:02,867 --> 00:04:04,535 I have nothing left to say to any of you. 66 00:04:04,619 --> 00:04:05,954 So if nobody minds, 67 00:04:06,037 --> 00:04:07,997 let's just quietly run out the clock. 68 00:04:12,961 --> 00:04:16,714 I've never gotten a "B" before. 69 00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:17,858 How could this have happened? 70 00:04:17,882 --> 00:04:19,634 I feel so dirty. 71 00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:23,596 The dirt's not coming off. 72 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,890 Okay, calm down. 73 00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:27,934 This must just be a little typo. 74 00:04:29,185 --> 00:04:30,520 Miss Hoover. 75 00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:33,940 There appears to be a mistake on my report card. 76 00:04:34,023 --> 00:04:36,234 You gave me a B in conduct? 77 00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:37,819 Now Lisa, everyone needs a blotch 78 00:04:37,902 --> 00:04:39,070 on their permanent record. 79 00:04:39,153 --> 00:04:41,614 Perhaps I'm not making myself clear. 80 00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:43,616 I think you should reconsider. 81 00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:46,828 Lisa... you're hurting me. 82 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:51,374 Mrs. Krabappel, in figuring out my final grades 83 00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:53,835 I hope you'll note that all of my textbooks 84 00:04:53,918 --> 00:04:56,087 are being returned in excellent condition... 85 00:04:56,170 --> 00:04:59,465 In some cases, still in their original wrappings. 86 00:04:59,549 --> 00:05:01,092 Duly noted. 87 00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:04,262 I'd also like to add, as I gaze upon your beauty, 88 00:05:04,345 --> 00:05:07,849 I've never seen an angel fly so low. 89 00:05:07,932 --> 00:05:09,559 Forget it, short pants. 90 00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:14,355 Mrs. Krabappel, If I don't get at least a "C" average 91 00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:16,232 I can't go to Kamp Krusty. 92 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:19,152 Have a "D" -lightful summer. 93 00:05:22,905 --> 00:05:23,990 Five... 94 00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:25,491 Four... 95 00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:26,993 Three... 96 00:05:27,076 --> 00:05:28,494 - Two... - Don't open your mouth. 97 00:05:28,578 --> 00:05:29,912 One. 98 00:05:38,838 --> 00:05:40,131 Wait a minute. 99 00:05:40,214 --> 00:05:42,383 You didn't learn how World War II ended. 100 00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:46,304 We won! 101 00:05:46,387 --> 00:05:48,973 U.S.A.! U.S.A.! 102 00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:50,600 U.S.A.! U.S.A.! 103 00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:53,478 I haven't seen such unfettered hurly-burlies 104 00:05:53,561 --> 00:05:55,271 since the fall of Saigon. 105 00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:58,483 Well, William, another school year gone by. 106 00:05:58,566 --> 00:06:01,277 And may I say, a job well done, sir. 107 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:02,904 Well, back to work then. 108 00:06:02,987 --> 00:06:04,907 Make sure to give those toilets a good scrubbing. 109 00:06:04,947 --> 00:06:07,784 We want the old girls sparkling when I get back. 110 00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:09,494 Aye, sir. 111 00:06:09,577 --> 00:06:11,621 You silk-wearing buttercup. 112 00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:14,457 All right, three whole months of Spaghetti-O's 113 00:06:14,540 --> 00:06:16,250 and daytime TV. 114 00:06:19,587 --> 00:06:20,867 So, Bart, will you be joining me 115 00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:23,007 in the bucolic splendor of Kamp Krusty? 116 00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,592 You bet. 117 00:06:24,675 --> 00:06:27,387 Check out this hand: All aces. 118 00:06:29,138 --> 00:06:30,890 "A "? 119 00:06:30,973 --> 00:06:35,353 Bart, why didn't you at least forge plausible grades? 120 00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,357 Hi, kids! 121 00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:41,543 Only one week left to sign up for the bestest summer ever 122 00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,569 at Kamp Krusty. 123 00:06:46,280 --> 00:06:47,949 Whup! 124 00:06:48,032 --> 00:06:49,951 Hey! Hah! Ho! Ho! 125 00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:52,161 Hey! Ho! Hey! 126 00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:55,790 Kamp Krusty is built on an actual Indian burial ground. 127 00:06:55,873 --> 00:06:57,750 We've got archery, wallet-making, 128 00:06:57,834 --> 00:06:59,752 the whole megillah. 129 00:06:59,836 --> 00:07:01,337 And for you fat kids, 130 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:03,297 my exclusive program of diet and ridicule 131 00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:05,049 will really get results. 132 00:07:07,176 --> 00:07:09,929 And the best part is, when you come to Kamp Krusty, 133 00:07:10,012 --> 00:07:12,390 you'll spend the summer with me! 134 00:07:12,473 --> 00:07:15,726 Honest injun. 135 00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:19,939 Well... here goes nothing. 136 00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:26,028 D' 137 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:27,655 Stupid roller skate. 138 00:07:27,738 --> 00:07:29,532 Well, Dad, here's my report card. 139 00:07:29,615 --> 00:07:32,326 I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. 140 00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:36,664 "A "? You don't think much of me, do you, boy? 141 00:07:36,747 --> 00:07:38,249 - No, sir. - You know, 142 00:07:38,332 --> 00:07:40,126 a "D" turns into a "B" so easily. 143 00:07:40,209 --> 00:07:41,586 You just got greedy. 144 00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:43,504 So I won't get to go to camp? 145 00:07:43,588 --> 00:07:45,423 Now, Bart, we made this deal 146 00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:47,484 because I thought it would help you get good grades, 147 00:07:47,508 --> 00:07:49,260 and you didn't. 148 00:07:49,343 --> 00:07:51,304 But why should you pay for my mistake? 149 00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:52,597 You mean I can go? 150 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:54,140 Yeah, I didn't want you 151 00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:55,975 hanging around all summer anyway. 152 00:07:56,058 --> 00:08:00,021 Dad, you're the best father a boy could ever have. 153 00:08:00,104 --> 00:08:01,104 Thanks, son. 154 00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:02,773 Now you got little hands. 155 00:08:02,857 --> 00:08:05,017 Can you reach under that mower and pull out that skate? 156 00:08:07,778 --> 00:08:08,778 Pff. Never mind. 157 00:08:15,077 --> 00:08:17,079 Bart, where's your bathing suit? 158 00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:19,415 - I'm gonna swim naked. - You're what? 159 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:22,335 Sure, there'll be a couple of uptight counselors 160 00:08:22,418 --> 00:08:24,420 who won't dig the Bart philosophy, 161 00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:28,007 but I feel the human body is a thing of beauty. 162 00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:32,011 Marge, am I crazy or is my back getting hairier? 163 00:08:32,094 --> 00:08:34,013 Before I go to camp, I'll need boosters 164 00:08:34,096 --> 00:08:35,973 for malaria, German measles 165 00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:37,297 encephalitis, Hansen's disease. 166 00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:39,393 Now, I'm afraid what we have here 167 00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:42,021 is an advanced case of hypochondria. 168 00:08:42,104 --> 00:08:43,648 There's only one known cure: 169 00:08:43,731 --> 00:08:46,984 A wowipop. 170 00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:49,195 Don't patronize me, doctor. 171 00:08:49,278 --> 00:08:52,323 It's our last family dinner for six weeks, 172 00:08:52,406 --> 00:08:54,700 but I promised myself I wouldn't cry. 173 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:04,710 I'm going to miss this. 174 00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:06,796 Hey, hands off my pickle. 175 00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:08,159 I don't see your name on it, boy. 176 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:09,882 No, but... 177 00:09:09,966 --> 00:09:10,967 Yeah? 178 00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:13,427 Checkmate. 179 00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:16,138 Always thinking two moves ahead. 180 00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:18,307 We'll see you when you get back 181 00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:19,559 from image enhancement camp. 182 00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:21,435 Spare me your euphemisms. 183 00:09:21,519 --> 00:09:24,605 It's fat camp for Daddy's chubby little secret. 184 00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:26,566 You promised you wouldn't make a scene. 185 00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:31,070 Good-bye, my special little guy. 186 00:09:31,153 --> 00:09:34,657 Lisa, watch out for poison ivy. 187 00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:37,577 Remember, leaves of three, let it be. 188 00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:40,746 Leaves of four, eat some more. 189 00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:41,910 - Good-bye. - Good-bye, Mom! 190 00:09:41,956 --> 00:09:43,249 - Good-bye! - Good-bye, Dad! 191 00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:44,917 I'll write you every day. 192 00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:46,294 Don't look in my closet. 193 00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:48,129 In fact, stay out of my room altogether. 194 00:09:48,212 --> 00:09:50,798 If the pets die don't replace them. I'll know! 195 00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:01,601 So long! Don't come back. 196 00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:10,318 Hi, kids. Welcome to Kamp Krusty. 197 00:10:13,154 --> 00:10:15,823 I'll see you in a few weeks. Until then, 198 00:10:15,906 --> 00:10:19,535 I've turned things over to my bestest buddy in the whole wide world... 199 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:20,995 Mr. Black. 200 00:10:21,078 --> 00:10:23,164 - I want you to treat... - Mr. Black 201 00:10:23,247 --> 00:10:25,124 with the same respect you would give me. 202 00:10:25,207 --> 00:10:27,084 - Now, here's... - Mr. Black. 203 00:10:29,879 --> 00:10:31,505 Thank you, Krusty, and welcome, children. 204 00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:34,133 I am Mr. Black, your head counselor. 205 00:10:34,216 --> 00:10:35,551 For the past 15 years, 206 00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,762 I was president of Euro-Krusty land 207 00:10:37,845 --> 00:10:39,597 until it blew up. 208 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:41,807 I'll take any questions you might have. 209 00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:43,768 You and then... one more. 210 00:10:43,851 --> 00:10:45,519 Can we call you Uncle Blackie? 211 00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:47,104 No. Last question. 212 00:10:47,188 --> 00:10:48,522 When do we get to see Krusty? 213 00:10:48,606 --> 00:10:50,608 He will be along eventually. 214 00:10:50,691 --> 00:10:51,931 In the meantime our counselors, 215 00:10:51,984 --> 00:10:53,527 Dolph, Jimbo, and Kearney 216 00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:55,696 will be happy to handle any problems you may have. 217 00:11:00,868 --> 00:11:02,828 Looks like we got ourselves a troublemaker. 218 00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:09,293 Hee hee hee. 219 00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:10,979 You can have the shower to yourself, Homie. 220 00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:13,589 - I'm finished. - No, you're not. 221 00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:16,133 Ooh. 222 00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:17,551 Here's your cabin. 223 00:11:17,635 --> 00:11:19,595 If you don't like it, T.S. 224 00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:32,400 This is a little more rustic than I expected. 225 00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:33,776 I'm not worried, Lis. 226 00:11:33,859 --> 00:11:35,152 You know why? 227 00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:36,696 Because of this... 228 00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:38,864 The Krusty brand seal of approval. 229 00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:40,133 You can only find it on products 230 00:11:40,157 --> 00:11:41,551 which meet the high personal standards 231 00:11:41,575 --> 00:11:43,077 of Krusty the Klown. 232 00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:47,748 Oops, I should have warned you. 233 00:11:47,832 --> 00:11:50,668 That clock gets incredibly hot if you leave it plugged in. 234 00:11:50,751 --> 00:11:53,754 That's okay. All this stuff is fine. 235 00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,091 Now, I am off to Wimbledon. 236 00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:03,389 Don't we get to roast marshmallows? 237 00:12:03,472 --> 00:12:05,349 Shut up and eat your pine cone. 238 00:12:14,525 --> 00:12:17,570 Are you sure that's safe? 239 00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:19,530 Well, it ain't getting any safer. 240 00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:28,164 All right, you balls of pan drippings, 241 00:12:28,247 --> 00:12:30,666 I want to see Crisco coming out of those pores. 242 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,001 We're not leaving 243 00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:34,837 until this Christmas ham gives me a pull-up. 244 00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:41,385 ♪ Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty ♪ 245 00:12:41,469 --> 00:12:46,182 ♪ By the shores of Big Snake lake ♪ 246 00:12:46,265 --> 00:12:49,810 ♪ Though your swings are rusty ♪ 247 00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:52,897 ♪ We know they'll never break ♪ 248 00:12:52,980 --> 00:12:54,190 Louder! Faster! 249 00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:57,067 ♪ From your gleaming mess hall ♪ 250 00:12:57,151 --> 00:13:00,529 ♪ To your hallowed baseball field ♪ 251 00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:03,824 ♪ To your spic-and-span infirmary ♪ 252 00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:07,203 ♪ Where all our wounds are healed ♪ 253 00:13:07,286 --> 00:13:10,414 ♪ Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty ♪ 254 00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:14,460 ♪ Below Mount Avalanche ♪ 255 00:13:14,543 --> 00:13:21,342 ♪ We will always love Kamp Krusty... ♪ 256 00:13:21,425 --> 00:13:24,428 ♪ A registered trademark of the Krusty corporation ♪ 257 00:13:24,512 --> 00:13:29,058 ♪ All rights reserved ♪ 258 00:13:34,230 --> 00:13:36,023 You're serving us gruel? 259 00:13:36,106 --> 00:13:37,691 Not quite. 260 00:13:37,775 --> 00:13:40,361 This is Krusty brand imitation gruel. 261 00:13:40,444 --> 00:13:44,114 Nine out of ten orphans can't tell the difference. 262 00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:46,534 Yo, Mr. Black... Another brandy. 263 00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:48,077 Gentlemen, to evil. 264 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:49,870 Marge, since the kids left, 265 00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:52,331 I've lost five pounds. 266 00:13:52,414 --> 00:13:54,583 That's wonderful. 267 00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:57,336 And look, new hair. 268 00:13:57,419 --> 00:14:00,005 I'm this close to having a comb-over. 269 00:14:06,303 --> 00:14:07,847 Lights out, losers. 270 00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:09,265 Yeah. We're meeting some tail 271 00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:11,183 on the other side of the lake. 272 00:14:15,938 --> 00:14:18,566 I feel like I'm going to die, Bart. 273 00:14:18,649 --> 00:14:19,859 We're all going to die, Lis. 274 00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:21,318 I meant soon. 275 00:14:21,402 --> 00:14:22,862 So did I. 276 00:14:24,947 --> 00:14:27,992 Strawberries. 277 00:14:29,451 --> 00:14:31,495 That's good. 278 00:14:31,579 --> 00:14:33,956 Hey, Lendl! Choke! Choke! 279 00:14:34,039 --> 00:14:35,583 Yeah! 280 00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:38,002 Point and game, Becker. 281 00:14:38,085 --> 00:14:39,604 And will the harlequin in the third row 282 00:14:39,628 --> 00:14:41,881 please keep his voice down. 283 00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:45,676 Sorry, folks. 284 00:14:45,759 --> 00:14:46,677 Sorry, your majesty. 285 00:14:46,760 --> 00:14:48,178 Hmph. 286 00:14:48,262 --> 00:14:49,513 "Dear kids: 287 00:14:49,597 --> 00:14:50,973 "I hope this letter finds you well. 288 00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:52,558 "We are doing great. 289 00:14:52,641 --> 00:14:54,685 "Your father is in the best shape 290 00:14:54,768 --> 00:14:56,937 he's been since... well, ever." 291 00:14:57,021 --> 00:14:59,315 Size! 292 00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:01,609 Strength! Agility! 293 00:15:01,692 --> 00:15:02,860 "We miss you terribly. 294 00:15:02,943 --> 00:15:04,820 "I hope these jellybean cookies 295 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:08,115 will tide you over until you get home." 296 00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:09,408 Hey, Simpson. 297 00:15:09,491 --> 00:15:11,160 Tell your mom her cookies sucked. 298 00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:15,497 "Dear Mom and Dad: 299 00:15:15,581 --> 00:15:17,583 "I no longer fear hell 300 00:15:17,666 --> 00:15:20,377 "because I've been to Kamp Krusty. 301 00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:23,839 Our nature hikes have become grim death marches." 302 00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:28,844 A snake bit me. 303 00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:30,471 Back in line, maggot. 304 00:15:32,890 --> 00:15:34,475 "Our arts and crafts center 305 00:15:34,558 --> 00:15:36,810 is, in actuality, a Dickensian workhouse." 306 00:15:38,228 --> 00:15:40,064 Come on, wimps. These Gucci wallets 307 00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:43,233 have to be on the streets of Hong Kong by Friday. 308 00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:47,655 "Bart makes it through the days 309 00:15:47,738 --> 00:15:49,573 relying on his unwavering belief 310 00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:51,533 that Krusty the Klown will come through..." 311 00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:54,453 Krusty is coming. Krusty is coming. Krusty is coming. 312 00:15:54,536 --> 00:15:56,580 "But I am far more pessimistic. 313 00:16:00,834 --> 00:16:02,554 "I am not sure if this letter will reach you 314 00:16:02,586 --> 00:16:05,297 as our lines of communication have been cut." 315 00:16:05,381 --> 00:16:06,382 Giddyap. 316 00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:07,591 "Now the effort of writing 317 00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:09,176 "has made me lightheaded 318 00:16:09,259 --> 00:16:13,263 "so I close by saying, 'Save us! Save us now!' 319 00:16:13,347 --> 00:16:14,473 Bart and Lisa." 320 00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:18,018 Kids' letters from camp. 321 00:16:18,102 --> 00:16:19,728 She complains now 322 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:21,271 but when we go to pick her up, 323 00:16:21,355 --> 00:16:23,023 she won't want to leave. 324 00:16:28,195 --> 00:16:29,488 Lisa, I've been thinking it over. 325 00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:30,990 Next summer I'm getting a job. 326 00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:38,664 Homer, it's getting late. 327 00:16:38,747 --> 00:16:40,416 We'll miss the fireworks. 328 00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:43,419 Marge, we've got all the fireworks we need 329 00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:44,753 right here. 330 00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,092 Well, kids, I promised you 331 00:16:50,175 --> 00:16:51,677 a little treat in lieu of dinner, 332 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,387 and here it is: 333 00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:55,514 The man who took an abandoned mule tannery 334 00:16:55,597 --> 00:16:57,975 and turned it into a summer wonderland: 335 00:16:58,058 --> 00:17:00,102 Mr. Krusty the Klown. 336 00:17:00,185 --> 00:17:01,854 See, I told you Krusty would come. 337 00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:03,605 Just like I said. 338 00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:05,399 He's gonna bring us food and water 339 00:17:05,482 --> 00:17:06,984 and smite our enemies. 340 00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,946 Now I must tell you kids, 341 00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:13,157 Krusty has laryngitis and a bad back, 342 00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:16,535 so he won't be saying anything or doing anything. 343 00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:18,162 Krusty looks fat. 344 00:17:18,245 --> 00:17:20,748 He's really having trouble keeping his balance. 345 00:17:20,831 --> 00:17:23,542 He's still funny, but not ha-ha funny. 346 00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:26,795 That's not Krusty the Klown! 347 00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:29,465 What, do you think I slapped a clown suit on some wino? 348 00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:34,887 Yeah, Bart, I am so Krunchy the Klown. 349 00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:37,806 All right, that's it. 350 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:40,225 I've been scorched by Krusty before. 351 00:17:40,309 --> 00:17:42,811 I got a rapid heartbeat from his Krusty brand vitamins. 352 00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:45,397 My Krusty calculator didn't have a seven or an eight. 353 00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:47,441 And Krusty's autobiography was self-serving 354 00:17:47,524 --> 00:17:48,984 with many glaring omissions. 355 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:51,403 But this time, he's gone too far. 356 00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:53,113 We want Krusty! 357 00:17:53,197 --> 00:17:56,909 We want Krusty! We want Krusty! 358 00:17:56,992 --> 00:18:00,746 Yeah, we want Krunchy! We want Krunchy! 359 00:18:00,829 --> 00:18:02,539 I thought you said you broke their spirits. 360 00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:04,333 We did. 361 00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:05,501 You broke nothing. 362 00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:06,794 Let's get 'em! 363 00:18:06,877 --> 00:18:08,003 To the hydrofoil. 364 00:18:17,179 --> 00:18:18,597 My chunky brothers, 365 00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:20,599 gorge yourselves at the trough of freedom. 366 00:18:22,976 --> 00:18:27,356 Sweet, nourishing gruel! 367 00:18:27,439 --> 00:18:29,149 Kowalski! 368 00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:30,609 My brownies! 369 00:18:30,692 --> 00:18:31,610 Wiggum. 370 00:18:31,693 --> 00:18:33,278 A change of underwear. 371 00:18:33,362 --> 00:18:34,696 Crandall. 372 00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:36,198 My insulin! 373 00:18:41,328 --> 00:18:44,248 Bart, you said you're gonna name it Camp Freedom. 374 00:18:44,331 --> 00:18:46,542 This has more zing. 375 00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:48,627 I dub thee sir... 376 00:18:48,710 --> 00:18:51,213 Urgent call for Mr. Klown. 377 00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:53,173 This better be important. 378 00:18:53,257 --> 00:18:54,550 Oy gevalt! 379 00:18:54,633 --> 00:18:57,928 Just let your head flop back and forth. 380 00:18:58,011 --> 00:19:01,765 Your neck is a well-cooked piece of asparagus. 381 00:19:01,849 --> 00:19:04,309 We interrupt "Surdrudinma Baradad's Yoga Party" 382 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:05,853 for this special bulletin. 383 00:19:08,063 --> 00:19:09,481 Ladies and gentlemen 384 00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:12,025 I've been to Vietnam, Afghanistan and Iraq, 385 00:19:12,109 --> 00:19:14,194 and I can say without hyperbole that 386 00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:17,990 this is a million times worse than all of them put together. 387 00:19:18,073 --> 00:19:22,119 Burn, Krusty, burn! Burn, Krusty, burn! 388 00:19:22,202 --> 00:19:24,454 A group of school-age Spartacuses 389 00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:26,290 has taken this camp by force. 390 00:19:26,373 --> 00:19:28,625 Three counselors are missing and presumed scared. 391 00:19:28,709 --> 00:19:30,460 What's that? 392 00:19:30,544 --> 00:19:32,355 I'm being told I can have an exclusive interview 393 00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:34,756 with the ringleader. 394 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:37,134 Don't be the boy. Don't be the boy. 395 00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:40,846 D' 396 00:19:43,849 --> 00:19:45,267 I just want the whole world to know 397 00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:47,811 that this was a really crappy camp. 398 00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:49,479 Can I say "crappy" on TV? 399 00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:50,898 Yes, on this network you can. 400 00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:55,336 Is it true you attempted suicide when you heard the news? 401 00:19:55,360 --> 00:19:57,654 Are you and Princess Di just friends? 402 00:19:57,738 --> 00:20:00,199 You people make me sick! You're vultures! 403 00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:02,242 Where were you when I sang at Farm Aid? 404 00:20:02,326 --> 00:20:05,287 Out of my way, you parasites. I said out of my way! 405 00:20:07,414 --> 00:20:11,210 I'm no fake. I'm the real Krusty. 406 00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:12,794 Yeah? 407 00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:14,522 Who played your daughter on the short-lived sitcom 408 00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:15,631 President Clown? 409 00:20:15,714 --> 00:20:17,257 I don't know her name. 410 00:20:17,341 --> 00:20:19,301 But she held up a liquor store last year. 411 00:20:19,384 --> 00:20:20,510 I smell bacon. 412 00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,471 Let's see if he's wearing a wire. 413 00:20:22,554 --> 00:20:23,805 Hey, whoa! 414 00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:25,724 Not the face. 415 00:20:25,807 --> 00:20:27,559 It is the real Krusty. 416 00:20:27,643 --> 00:20:29,478 Look at that pacemaker scar. 417 00:20:29,561 --> 00:20:31,021 The cattle skull birthmark, 418 00:20:31,104 --> 00:20:33,357 and his famous superfluous nipple. 419 00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:35,234 Well, at least you're not as bad as customs. 420 00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:36,944 How could you, Krusty? 421 00:20:37,027 --> 00:20:39,488 I'd never lend my name to an inferior product. 422 00:20:42,324 --> 00:20:45,702 They drove a dump truck full of money to my house. 423 00:20:45,786 --> 00:20:48,830 I'm not made of stone. 424 00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:50,374 Krusty, this camp was a nightmare. 425 00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:51,792 They fed us gruel. 426 00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:53,436 They forced us to make wallets for export, 427 00:20:53,460 --> 00:20:56,046 and one of the campers was eaten by a bear. 428 00:20:56,129 --> 00:20:58,924 My God! 429 00:20:59,007 --> 00:21:00,676 Well, actually, the bear just ate his hat. 430 00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:02,386 - Was it a nice hat? - Yeah. 431 00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:05,555 My God! 432 00:21:05,639 --> 00:21:07,307 Well, I'm gonna make it all up to you. 433 00:21:07,391 --> 00:21:10,060 I'm gonna show you kids the time of your life. 434 00:21:10,143 --> 00:21:14,314 Get ready for two weeks at the happiest place on earth. 435 00:21:14,398 --> 00:21:16,441 Tijuana! 436 00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:22,698 ♪ South of the border ♪ 437 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:27,119 ♪ Down Mexico way ♪ 438 00:21:27,202 --> 00:21:29,871 ♪ That's where I fell in love ♪ 439 00:21:29,955 --> 00:21:33,583 ♪ When stars above came out to play ♪ 440 00:21:33,667 --> 00:21:36,837 ♪ And now, as I wander ♪ 441 00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:41,008 ♪ My thoughts ever stray ♪ 442 00:21:41,091 --> 00:21:44,136 ♪ South of the border ♪ 443 00:21:44,219 --> 00:21:48,390 ♪ Down Mexico way ♪ 444 00:21:48,473 --> 00:21:51,977 ♪ Yes, she was a picture ♪ 445 00:21:52,060 --> 00:21:55,647 ♪ In old Spanish lace ♪ 446 00:21:55,731 --> 00:21:58,859 ♪ And just for a tender while ♪ 447 00:21:58,942 --> 00:22:03,238 ♪ I kissed the smile upon her face ♪ 448 00:22:03,322 --> 00:22:06,616 ♪ For it was fiesta ♪ 449 00:22:06,700 --> 00:22:10,162 ♪ And we were so gay ♪ 450 00:22:10,245 --> 00:22:13,165 ♪ South of the border ♪ 451 00:22:13,248 --> 00:22:17,336 ♪ Down Mexico way ♪ 452 00:22:32,100 --> 00:22:35,228 ♪ Those mission bells told me ♪ 453 00:22:35,312 --> 00:22:39,024 ♪ That I must not stray ♪ 454 00:22:39,107 --> 00:22:42,486 ♪ South of the border ♪ 455 00:22:42,569 --> 00:22:46,573 ♪ Down Mexico way ♪ 456 00:22:49,117 --> 00:22:51,745 Olé! 457 00:22:51,828 --> 00:22:54,373 CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.